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One of my closest thai Friend is headed back  to Thailand today.

Actually I am very sad deep down in my heart. But as a typical Leo and proud women, of course I look as much as possible Normal in front of everyone. & make people seemed like I am really coping well of her departure.
But me , being myself knows that I am not well inside my heart. Heart brokened and sad.

You know, it's always really sad to see people leave in my life.
Well, you can say that Thailand and Singapore is very near, but of course it will be different !! When I need my Friend , she won't be physically around to comfort me . ( just like I feel so empty being in LDR) --> I am sort of but not really (?!) .
It really sadden me to see people leave me.

Sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't be having close foreign Friends. Because I know they will leave singapore city one day and then the whole story of "how sad and lonely" I am will repeat.
This isn't the first time that happened, but definitely I can't help to be really sad about it.

Have been pretty dull over her departure since 2 weeks ago.
Time don't stop to wait for people, it's ticking always.
&In the end
People just leave.
.
.
.
.
&I I got so negative at work because I saw too many people left the company. I know it's for the good of them. But sometimes I wonder , am I too loyal to this company ?
It all links up
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I fall in love with a guy that logically speaking should not be loved.

He is charming
He is cunning
He knows how to deal with girls (maybe too well)

He asked me once if I wanted to be his gf. The first time I rejected because he then had s Girlfriend. I liked him but I rejected.
I think this guy suck big time , being a 2 timer.

Then after the broke up, he asked again. Yea , persistant indeed.
My heart become hesitant, knowing that now there's nothing between us. ( frankly speaking ) and i am not name as the "other women"
Here come another  problem.

Do
You ever
Believe in LDR ?

What will the future holds ?
He's from this x county where has vast differently in culture , mentality , language from mine.
How do I introduce to my mum ?  I know my mum going to be not pleased with this guy.
I don't Want to move over to his country to stay, will he come over ? &I I know he love his country
Does he have enough money for our future ? ( well, I am ok with 50/50 for everything )
He's popular among girls , I am so insecure. Will he cheat on me like he cheat on his previous gf ?
How will my friends view me ? "Ahoy why this liling find this kind of xxxx guy?" Then,can I able to tolerate such "society views" and then  continue dating him ?

perhaps  is his determination , perhaps is his sweet talking , perhaps his charm work on me, I just know I have fallen in love with someone that I shouldnt have .

I am so vexed now almost Everyday .